As I was scrolling through my feed instead of dealing with yet ANOTHER meeting (we just got back from spring break–we had a meeting then!), this wonderful entry from Balladeer’s Blog jumped out at me like a like a big-ass Bible that’s been hastily repurposed as a storybook.
Look, I could tell you about how crazy the whole damn “movie” is, but why should I do it when you can read it from a much better blogger than I? Just don’t forget to live high on the hog in the witness protection program…
Welcome to one of my laziest posts of the season…which is fitting because this is one of the laziest subjects/videos I’ve seen in a WHILE (and I’ve been watching AI-created videos that sound everything out phonetically!) How is it lazy? Let me count the ways…
Anyhoo–this is a lazy post for a lazy video. Enjoy!
The 5 Worst Monsters of the 1970s Horror Film
via The 5 Worst Monsters of the 1970s Horror Film – Flashbak
May as well end the month on a “list.” This time, it’s the 5 worst monsters of the 1970s…in horror. It’s from the folks at Flashbak, so you know it’s good. Enjoy, and make sure you watch the best worst movie you can think of this weekend. It’s been a pretty fun ride, but if I ever do this again, I will try to talk myself out of it. Blogging is harder than I thought! 😉 But it was fun to add to my bad movie repertoire, and I may do it for the various Halloween blogathons that dot the interwebs. To quote one of the movies listed above, “Well…”
via Ed Wood: Not Actually The Worst Director in History | Den of Geek
How did Ed Wood get the title of “World’s Worst Director?” (Then again, we’d also have to ask how William “One Shot” Beaudine was at least the runner-up, even though he was once a highly regarded director.) Of course, we can put most of the blame on the doorstep of the Medveds, who deemed Ed “the worst” with their Golden Turkey tome. I can only imagine that they hadn’t seen very many movies from the period they were in, because NONE of the Dolomite movies made the cut, but Trouble Man did?! Why not just throw Super Fly and Shaft in there too, since we’re complaining about blaxploitation films with kick-ass soundtracks…
Anyhoo, where was I going with this? Oh, that Ed Wood wasn’t the world’s worst director–far from it. I can name at least THREE worse directors off the top of my head: Bill Rebane/Herschell Gordon Lewis (Monster-A-Go-Go/Terror at Half Day); Larry Buchanan (Zontar: The Thing From Venus); Coleman Francis (all three of his films); Doris Wishman (Double Agent 73, Let Me Die a Woman); Ted V. Mikels (The Girl in Gold Boots, The Doll Squad)…the list is literally endless!
I think the problem lies with Ed Wood’s films being better than “so bad they’re good.” There’s something about Wood’s films, even the cringetastic Orgy of the Dead and The Revenge of Dr. X that makes them watchable. You’re not yelling at the screen at the stupidity of the writing. (The CLUNKINESS, maybe, but not the stupidity!)
Anyhoo, take a look around the site and enjoy the Den of Geek!
via Mr. No Legs – 1979 – Review
If you have lots of free time on your hands, take a look at the wonderful time-wasting site The Worst Movies Ever Made. Now, “worst” is in the eye of the beholder, but holy gee whiz…this one’s bad. Not even the ever-present John Agar or Richard Jaeckel can help this turkey. And when you finally get to see the title character, look out!
via » Octaman (1971)»Monster Shack Movie Reviews
Hoo, boy! Is this a stinker, or is this a stinker? In fact, it stinks so badly, the star of the film didn’t live long enough to see it completed! Pier Angeli committed suicide before filming was completed. Now, I can’t say whether or not this terrible film assisted her decision in any way. In fact, it’s impossible to say–however, if I were already pre-disposed to depression, and I was working on a film like this, or working ANY job that is just gut-bustingly horrible, I might be more inclined to take a few more Nembutals with my champagne dinner.
Now that I’ve gotten you thoroughly depressed, cheer yourself up with a visit to the good folks at the Monster Shack Reviews site. Not only do they have oldy-moldy-goldies like Octaman, they’ve also got modern movies, from the 2010s!
via AND YOU CALL YOURSELF A SCIENTIST! – Dracula Vs Frankenstein (1971)
We return to the wonderful And You Call Yourself A Scientist! to take a look at yet ANOTHER Frankenstein’s Monster…Al Adamson’s Dracula vs. Frankenstein. I’d bet $3 (half of the movie’s budget once they finished paying the actors) that this was patched together from even more movies than Adamson admitted. Of course, it began as a biker film, just as the gloriously theme songed “The Fakers.” That film had a theme song by Nelson “I worked with Sinatra” Riddle, but there was something a bit “off” about the lyrics. A little digging, and it turns out that my instinct was right–the music was Riddle’s, but the oddly off lyrics were pure Adamson (he may have had some help). My point–and I do have one–is that I’m fairly certain that this type of movie (the patched together remnants of at least 3 other films) couldn’t have gotten any play except in the 1970s (and earlier). Jules White did it with the Three Stooges, turning out “new” shorts in a matter of HOURS. Who’d notice that Creeps was almost exactly the same as The Ghost Talks? No one, that’s who. Little attention was being paid to short subjects, and the same goes for these types of movies for the drive-in circuit. Who was really paying much attention to what was going on? You were either necking, getting high, drinking, or getting high while necking and drinking.
Anyhoo, enjoy another fine review from And You Call Yourself a Scientist!
Apparently, I’ve lost ANOTHER day somewhere (Day 15 is missing, just like Bunny Lake!) So, without further ado, here’s what SHOULD’VE been featured…Angel, Angel Down We Go (aka Cult of the Damned). You’ve got Jennifer Jones, Roddy McDowall, Lou Rawls, Holly Near, and most importantly, Joe Besser in a cameo as a tour bus driver.
via Cult of the Damned (1969) – Journeys in Classic Film
via Doris Wishman • Great Director profile • Senses of Cinema
I guess this is Day 12–did I post anything for yesterday (or Saturday? Better check that out…)
Anyhoo, here’s a look at the main reason why I’m even DOING this type of thing, one Doris Wishman. Her movies aren’t just movies…they’re experiences. Take a good look at Deadly Weapons or Double Agent 73, her double feature starring actress Chesty Morgan. They have to be seen to be believed, and you WILL NOT get the soundtracks out of your head. Seriously, I can run through the soundtracks of both films in my head, beat for beat!
How does this relate to Six Degrees of Stoogeration? Come on–there’s got to be a link somewhere! Anyhoo redux, take a look around the site, it’s got plenty of great info, not just about Ms. Wishman, but much, much more!
If you call yourself a enjoyer, a “common sewer” if you will, of bad movies and the illogic thereof, you won’t find a better spot than And You Call Yourself a Scientist! Enjoy the proper skewering (but with love, and SCIENCE!) of Sting of Death, a bit of Floridasploitation from 1966!
SEE! The “monster” made up of garbage bags!
SEE! Terrible “day for night!”
SEE! The stupidest “teenagers” that ever stupided!
via AND YOU CALL YOURSELF A SCIENTIST! – Sting Of Death (1966)
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